Dear Chevy Astro Van...

Dear Chevy Astro Van,

You've had a good run, but it's time to go. I remember riding around in you as a kid in friend's parent's cars, but those years have long passed. Now your only use is to transfer lower income families at 40 mph on the freeway, spewing smog into the lungs of everyone who is cursed enough to be stuck behind you. On top of that, let's face it, you are now used in about 50% of gang-related crimes. Do your part to lower crime - it's time for your to call it a day, throw in the towel, and find your way to the closest junkyard. You've done well for yourself, but now, your time has come. I mean, Obama tried with the whole Cash for Clunkers deal, but some of your owners didn't seem to get the memo (which is perfectly fine with me since I don't feel like financing any more of those deals with my tax dollars). Your fate is now the same as other vehicles like the Ford Windstar. How come your owners aren't more like theirs? I haven't seen one of those wretched things in ages. So do me a favor: find that junkyard, and we'll be sure to recycle you into something new and beautiful so we can start the process all over again.

Sincerely,

Cory Watilo

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I'm sorry, but this precludes me from EVER buying a GM vehicle

GM is touting a new OnStar feature that disables your vehicle if OnStar thinks it is involved in a high speed pursuit.

There are so many things that can go wrong here. It's a good idea in theory, and maybe a good selling point, but when put into practice, these things tend to be a nightmare. There are always bugs and glitches - you'll be driving and for no reason, your car will shut off. Besides that, I don't trust the people in control of these systems, and with the government owning part of GM, the lines between government and personal freedom get crossed way too easily.