Men socialize by insulting each other, but they don't really mean it.
Women socialize by complimenting each other, and they don't really mean it either.
Several weeks ago, I didn't know what love was. I had seen her, heard about her, done some internet stalking on her, but never actually met her. Then when we came face to face that glorious Saturday around 11:00 AM in a Best Buy, I knew it was love. Never did I think it was possible to fall in love like this. Now I know just how deeply I can love. Ever since that Saturday, I have only found myself more in love than the day before. Every day I wake up, open my eyes, and see her lying next to me in my bed, fully charged and ready for another great day together. I spend hours touching her before I even put my feet on the floor. What's the point of even getting out of bed anymore when you have her? Yes, she has completely eliminated the need for real women. It's true. That's how much I love my iPad.
From an email chain (no, I don't normally read them). But it's too good to not pass on.
John Smith started the day early, having set his alarm clock
(MADE IN JAPAN)
for 6 am.
While his coffeepot
(MADE IN CHINA)
(MADE IN HONG KONG)
He put on a dress shirt,
(MADE IN SRI LANKA)
(MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes.
(MADE IN KOREA)
After cooking breakfast in his new electric skillet,
(MADE IN INDIA)
(MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch
(MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio
(MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car,
(MADE IN GERMANY) filled it with gas,
(from SAUDI ARABIA) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.
At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day checking his computer,
(MADE IN MALAYSIA) John decided to relax for a while.
He put on his sandals,
(MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine,
(MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV,
(MADE IN INDONESIA) and then wondered why he couldn't find a good paying job in AMERICA.
AND NOW HE'S HOPING HE CAN GET HELP FROM A PRESIDENT
MADE IN KENYA.